Did you know that this is the time of the year when people of Indian descent celebrate an ancient festival of spring called “Holi” or “Phagwah”, that includes peacemaking? Everyone gets what can best be described as colored baby powder – red, green, blue, etc. – and they sprinkle it on people with whom they’ve had a conflict. Here’s how Karna Singh, with the Rakjumari Cultural Center in Queens, NY,  describes it to Pulse of the Planet:

“It’s a time when people try to heal any difference or disagreement or conflict that existed from the past on this day. And the fun about it is that the way you do it is, not by even discussing the problem, but just marching straight up to your brother who you quarreled with, or mother who you were angry with, and take that colored powder and spray them, or rub it onto them, and hug them and kiss them.”

Will this really make peace? It won’t help with deep sins like adultery or abuse, but it just might have its place. Perhaps you realize you said something to someone that came across as more critical or angry than you intended; or you belatedly discovered that you missed a friend’s birthday or special occasion; or you neglected to return a phonecall. Rather than go through the awkward steps of apologizing, you can just walk up to them and throw some colored powder on them. They’ll presumably know what you mean. It’s a way to make peace without making peace. It’s better than nothing! Of course it’s not as beneficial as going through the true confession-forgiveness process—but for those conflicts where we were probably not going to do that anyway, this at least puts a peaceful veneer on the relationship.

Do some people throw colored powder on each other, year after year?

It strikes me that our Western Christian culture lacks a peacemaking ritual. Jews have their High Holy Days, and the Amish have their annual pre-communion time, but mainstream Christianity lacks an annual reminder of the need for peacemaking. Columnist Ann Landers has tried to fill this void with “Reconciliation Day” on April 2: “Since 1989, I have suggested that April 2 be set aside to write that letter or make that phone call and mend a broken relationship. Life is too short to hold grudges. To forgive can be enormously life-enhancing. . . .” A Catholic group is promoting October 4, the feast day of St. Francis of Assisi, as Reconciliation Day: “Reconciliation Day’s large purpose is to contribute to the resolution of conflicts and to promote reconciliation and peaceful, even joyful, coexistence.” (http://reconciliationday.net/RECONCILIATION_DAY_STORY.html)

From a New Testament perspective, every day should be “Reconciliation Day.” Jesus taught that, if while you are worshiping you remember that someone is upset with you, you should leave worship and go reconcile with that person (Matthew 5:7). We don’t get to postpone it. But the reality is that we do keep postponing it, and an annual cultural ritual might be just what we need to initiate peacemaking. Where can I get some of that baby powder?

I had the privilege of being one of the judges of the International Law School Mediation Tournament in Ann Arbor this weekend, and it gave me great hope for the next generation of lawyers. Teams of law students from eleven law schools in the U.S. and Canada participated in three rounds of mock mediations, playing the roles of attorneys, clients and co-mediators. They followed an interest-based model of mediation, looking for win/win resolutions. They played smart, savvy lawyers who recognized that things in addition to money were driving the litigation—e.g., protecting a reputation, wanting an apology, maintaining racial dignity—so that the outcome needed to include these things along with financial remuneration. They played skilled, neutral, impartial mediators who drew out underlying interests and facilitated negotiated resolutions. After each round was finished, the students offered insightful self-evaluations of their performance, and then opened themselves up to critique from the two judges who observed their mock mediation. The students were very receptive to our feedback, which made it rewarding for us judges. It’s encouraging to know that law students are learning how to be wise advocates in mediation, as well as how to be interest-based mediators, as part of their legal education. It bodes well for the future of the legal profession.

Michigan’s Court Rule on mediation is now ten years old. The provision on confidentiality in mediation has proven to be both too broad in some ways, and too narrow in others. In November 2008, the State Court Administrative Office convened a committee to recommend changes to the court rule on mediation confidentiality. The committee members included attorneys, some of whom are ADR providers and some of whom are ADR “consumers,” as well as law professors, mediation trainers, an ADR Clerk from a local court, a CDRP center director, and me — over two dozen in all. The committee met several times as a whole, for some wide-ranging discussions on the intricacies of confidentiality. A strong influence was the Uniform Mediation Act, which some states have already adopted. For various reasons, we chose not to recommend adopting the UMA, but to incorporate its best provisions into a new court rule.

Confidentiality in mediation gets very complicated! While we all agree in principle that it’s a good thing, it turns out to be very difficult both to define it and to ensure it. I was humbled by the many wise people on the committee who understood its intricacies far better than I could. We finally agreed on a draft rule this summer, and it was submitted to the Michigan Supreme Court for their approval. The Court just ruled last week that the proposed rule should be published for comment. If everyone agrees that this rule is an improvement, Michigan should have a new court rule on confidentiality in 2011.

Here is a link to the proposed Michigan Court Rule on Confidentiality: http://courts.michigan.gov/scao/resources/publications/reports/ODR-MediationConfidentialityReport.pdf